september is a little goofy, i mean, Goosey.

Hi people.  It's good to be back after a week.  

Let me introduce you to the Wild Goose.

Did you know that, in Celtic Christianity (early Christianity in what is now Ireland and Great Britain), the Wild Goose was a symbol for the Holy Spirit?  Fascinating, I know.  Bear with me...

As boring as this may initially sound, let me tell you: I have a revelation in store for you; it might rock your world.  And it all popped into my head this week- in the midst of crazy, chaos-filled, September, back-to-school frustration!

The Celtic Christians (we think) considered the wild goose to be a symbol of the Holy Spirit, which is interesting (yes it is!) to us, because we often associate the Spirit with a dove, or something equally as peaceful.  But, the Celts were on to something with the use of this bird, because in days like these it's difficult to think the Spirit is anywhere to be found.  

Let me explain...

We've been going bonkers at church trying to get programming off the ground.  We plan things and either a bunch of people show up (wonderful!) or hardly anyone (major bummer!).  We're having a hard time knowing if we're asking too much of people, or not expecting enough.  We are also considering the fact that we might be offering too much, which is quite possible.  

In any case, as a staff, and as individuals who are trying to transition from summer to fall, and everything that goes with it, we've been feeling a little spiritually depleted.

The image of the Wild Goose brought to mind the geese that I see on a regular basis.  They're usually in some disgusting little batch of sewage water on the side of the road near a strip mall.  Their natural habitat used to be there, but now it's been overtaken by the busyness of consumerism and capitalism that surrounds it.  Just like the church, peoples' lives are so consumed by choices, and the ability to do other things, that the church has been pushed out of its natural habitat.  We're in the world, but not of it.  And, it's a weird and anxiety-ridden feeling, at times.  

But, none of the craziness is going to go away.  So, I thought: time to reframe.  Could it be that this chaotic time of year is, in fact, the work of the Wild Goosey Spirit?  Is the Spirit trying to tell us something new, push us around a bit, honk loudly at us, and tire us out as we attempt to fly in perfect formation for the upcoming program year?  Maybe it's okay to be in the muck on the side of the road because it teaches us something.

I'm learning that in order to find joy in this life, we have to embrace a Spirit like the Wild Goose. One that is unpredictable, loud, annoying, squawking, dirty, and lacks a place in the world.  I have to accept this kind of Spirit because, like the Wild Geese, we must fly together and help each other when we're tired in order to get to a better destination for the months ahead.  We must be open to re-formation, to let a new goose take the lead, to trust that the wind will carry us, that our wings will not fail us, and that we've done this a whole bunch of times before.  And, we have to become comfortable with the uncomfortable- our natural habitat is no longer.  The church is being being forced out.  And yet, seekers are still coming, if fewer in number.  And there is still a stirring among us to move- maybe we just have to fly up?

The Spirit is pushing me.  It's challenging me to be open to newness and change.  It's telling me to stop worrying about details and numbers, and focus on people who need a good word.  It's asking me to stop being upset at the little things, and to start enjoying this frenetic gift of a life.

Embrace the Wild, Goosey Spirit, friends.  It might be trying to tell you something.

how God feels, today.

As soon as I woke up this morning I saw it- the posts about 9/11 were starting to pour into peoples' status updates.  I don't mind this.  In fact, I think it's good to remember that day.  All of us remember where we were that day, what happened, and how we felt when we saw those planes fly into the World Trade Center buildings.

It has been 11 years, now, and those images are still fresh in our minds.  

I want to suggest, though, something that I haven't seen in too many facebook posts, at least not yet, and not among my non-clergy friends.  It's a reality I think about often, but rarely suggest to others for fear of sounding pious or rude.  But, I figure on a day like today it's appropriate, and so I'll put it out there.  

On a day like today, when we remember those who died as victims, those firefighters and police officers who worked tirelessly for days in the rubble, and those who served in the war(s) following, should we remember, as well, how God felt on that day? how God has felt everyday since? how God, herself, remembers today?

This isn't a political question, or even a theological one, really.  It's just a table-turning kind of question. There should be no doubt in anyone's mind that I am grateful to live in a country where many freedoms I enjoy everyday are protected.  But, I guess, that's not really the point of this post.

When inconceivable violence and evil occur in the world; when hatred evolves to such a level as terrorism; when extremist attack is followed by war; how does it make God feel?  And, is it important to reflect and pray upon this very question?  Would it make a difference if, in addition to remembering all the things we remember on this day, we also remember the way God felt as he saw his people- all his people- die such a horrible, tragic death? the way God felt when he saw what we could do to each other? 

My guess is that there are varying opinions out there on who God's people are, and I really don't want to get into that, here.  But, what I will say is this: I don't think God pays too much attention to human-made borders.  I don't think God separates his children by country, or by the governments that run them.  And, for that reason, I believe on 9/11/01, and in the days after, God wept for all humanity.  God knew what would happen in the days to come, and the pain that God felt, that God took onto his very self, was the pain of every human being in the entire world.  

"The Lord saw that the wickedness of humankind was great in the earth, and that every inclination of the thoughts of their hearts was only evil continually.  And the Lord was sorry that he had made humankind on the earth, and it grieved him to his heart." Genesis 6:5-6

God grieves.  And, we should remember that.

But, I'm guessing that there have been glimpses of hope that God has seen, as well.  And, we should remember that, too.  For God does promise a world of the future, where days like 9/11 will be a distant memory for us, and for him, as well.  These words from Isaiah 2 have been a promise for centuries- let's live into them and into the Kingdom of God, for God's sake and our own.

"There's a day coming when the mountain of God's House Will be The Mountain - solid, towering over all mountains. All nations will river toward it, people from all over set out for it.  They'll say, "Come, let's climb God's Mountain, go to the House of the God of Jacob. He'll show us the way he works so we can live the way we're made." Zion's the source of the revelation. God's Message comes from Jerusalem.  He'll settle things fairly between nations. He'll make things right between many peoples. They'll turn their swords into shovels, their spears into hoes. No more will nation fight nation; they won't play war anymore.  Come, family of Jacob, let's live in the light of God." Isaiah 2 (The Message)

I'll leave you with a video someone posted on Facebook this morning.  I love Cantus, anyways, but this hymn in particular is perfect for today.  It's called The Finlandia Hymn by Jean Sibelius.  It's beautiful.  Here are the lyrics:  

This is my song, O God of all the nations,

a song of peace for lands afar and mine;

this is my home, the country where my heart is;

here are my hopes, my dreams, my holy shrine:

but other hearts in other lands are beating

with hopes and dreams as true and high as mine.

My country's skies are bluer than the ocean,

and sunlight beams on cloverleaf and pine;

but other lands have sunlight too, and clover,

and skies are everywhere as blue as mine:

O hear my song, thou God of all the nations,

                                                a song of peace for their land and for mine.

Peace, friends.

it's the little things.

                          

I had a meeting last night with some folks at church who do the work that is usually thankless, goes unnoticed, can (I’m sure) feel monotonous, at times.  They’re just doing their part to make the world a better place, and they’re doing it with humility.  These people don’t ask for fanfare or recognition, but I try to pump them up once in awhile.  And maybe that’s because I, too, need to remind myself that the task of caring for people is ongoing, and while it is rewarding much of the time, there’s never a “job well done” kind of feeling.  Frankly, I think this is the reason so many people get burned out at church- we’re not good at thinking about the small things we do as having any kind of significance in the world, and that is entirely not true.

So, I read them these words from 1 John 3:

“This is how we've come to understand and experience love: Christ sacrificed his life for us. This is why we ought to live sacrificially for our fellow believers, and not just be out for ourselves.  If you see some brother or sister in need and have the means to do something about it but turn a cold shoulder and do nothing, what happens to God's love? It disappears. And you made it disappear.  My dear children, let's not just talk about love; let's practice real love.”

Often times, I think, we get caught up with the word about Jesus “laying his life down for us” or “sacrificed his very life for us”.  And, while I think it’s important to reflect on the magnitude of what God has done there, it’s difficult for us to relate to.  Does God want us to give our lives too?  Is that what that means?  Or, maybe God doesn’t want us to die, but do we have to spend every waking hour trying to be better, do more, etc.?  The answer, clearly, is no.  But, what does God expect when he says that we should live sacrificially? 

Loving one anther, or laying down our lives for one another should 1) not be intimidating, and 2) we shouldn’t think too hard about it.  The love that we know about from Jesus doesn’t have to stay rooted in the past as some unattainable ideal.  We know what Jesus has done, and his act propels us do what we can- to love, and give the world hope that God is still among us.  In other words, if you have any inkling that your life has somehow been transformed by the love of Christ, then you have new life- life abundant.  And you can lay down that life for anyone or everyone you meet- whether it’s through a note or a phone call, a smile to someone on the street, or lending a helping hand when it’s needed.

I loved this quote from a professor I’ve read before.  He says, “To give one's life in this way, in imitation of Jesus' own love, is more than simply a result of believing; it is the concrete shape that belief takes in the world, and the presence of such giving is a sign that God's love is present and active.  If we don’t continue to act, even in the smallest ways, the love of God in Christ is not made known to the world.”

So, friends, keep doing what you’re doing.  Actions speak louder than words (not always true- heck, you’re reading words, now!).  Acting like Jesus, or “laying down your life” isn’t so bad.  Yes, sacrifice implies giving something up, or losing a little bit of yourself for the sake of another, but it can be on a small scale most of the time.  It's these little acts that add up, these tiny ways in which we lay down our life that make all the difference.  In fact, with God’s help, it’s transforming the world, bit by bit.

“My dear children, let's not just talk about love; let's practice real love.”

i shouldn't be left alone.

I have been all alone since Friday morning.  Well, I mean, I've interacted with human beings, but my husband left me (!) from Friday to Monday night (okay, just for the weekend, but still?!).  For an extreme extrovert this is a long time to be alone.  So, I've been getting projects done... half done- I'm also a little disorganized so I "project hop" from one thing to the next (Mom, if you are reading this, you know I get this from you!).  I've run, spent quality time with my dog, done a little cleaning and shopping, cooked, napped, and rested a bit.  I guess it's been alright to spend some time alone, but I'll be honest and say I can't handle much more of this!!

I AM grateful for Labor Day Weekend, however.  

Timber is doing a really good job, lately, of staying on the porch while I do projects.  This was in the midst of cleaning out my car, which, I'll be frank, NEEDED IT.  I got that turquoise tin tub in the background there at an estate sale on Friday that was amazing.

Timber waits for scraps in the kitchen... no success.

I love my house, I love my kitchen, I love exposed brick in my house/kitchen.  And check out the little system for opening the window above the back door.  Ugh, I would've hated to live in this house a hundred years ago in the summertime, when opening that window would have been necessary.

I made butternut squash soup.  No recipe, really, but I boiled hunks of squash, poured out most of the water, added chicken boullion and italian spice, salt and pepper, and then I used my hand blender to blend it with a little sour cream at the end.  Also good with some parm on top.

Also, I'm coloring.  With markers.

And, for a final confession, I mix funfetti cake mix with sugar free vanilla creamer.  It's a delicious little dessert.  But, it's also why I shouldn't be left alone!

Have a great Labor Day, tomorrow! 

dog days of summer.

 The dog days of summer are here...

I've been finding myself anxious for the Fall- both excited and nervous.  I'm excited for the weather to change, for Fall colors, crisp air, and, let's face it, the option of wearing pants!  It's too hot for pants right now.  I'm also excited for everyone to come back to church in full force.  It'll be fun to see choirs, kids, Sunday school, mid-week programming all back in action!  But, I'm nervous, too.  From September to June, it is just plain busy.  Evening meetings are a source of dread for me, though I'm fine once I get there.  I know I can get it all done, and I trust that it will be fruitful for me and for the people I work with, but man, the post-Labor Day rush is looming over my head.

I took both of these pictures in the last week.  A reminder to enjoy these last few slow days.  The thick, humidity-filled heat actually helps you slow down, sometimes.

This week got me to thinking about time- either wishing it away, or not wanting the next day to come.  I'm experiencing both right now, and while it might be an inevitable feeling, I may need to be better about enjoying each day as it comes- cliche, but true.

I also started considering what God might think about my concept of time.  I don't know that God feels bad for me with my ramped up schedule, but there's something to be said about interpreting our busy-ness.  Do we see our vocations, our busy lives, our responsibilities as a gift? as a call?  Or, are they simply days filled with work until a sabbath day when we can relax and "really" do what we want?

Don't get me wrong, sabbath is important- it's good to do nothing, to worship, etc.  Everyone needs a day off.

But, more often than not, we're always thinking ahead, planning for the next thing, organizing our lives with calendars, alarms on our phone, bulletin boards and elaborate file systems (okay, I don't file).  And because none of this is going away any time soon, maybe I need to reframe.

This text from John surprised me in a way I wasn't expecting.  It's sort of a scary passage, actually, because Jesus had to be careful for fear of being killed.  In it he talks about time, though time for Jesus was based on one thing- when he was going to die, and what he could do between the present, and that future day, to tell people about God.  This part from John 7 reads:

His brothers said, "Why don't you leave here and go up to the Feast so your disciples can get a good look at the works you do?  No one who intends to be publicly known does everything behind the scenes. If you're serious about what you are doing, come out in the open and show the world."  His brothers were pushing him like this because they didn't believe in him either.  Jesus came back at them, "Don't crowd me. This isn't my time. It's your time - it's always your time; you have nothing to lose." 

The disciples were pressuring Jesus, trying to get him to do things to convince them, and others, that he was the Son of God.  They even threatened him a bit by telling him that no one who wants to get things done does it in secret!  But, Jesus told them, look, it's not my time to be the center of attention, it's your time and you have nothing to lose.

I think I need to remember not to put so much pressure on myself to be ready, or on Jesus to show up.  The church year will begin whether I get everything done in time, or not.  And Summer will turn into Fall whether I want it to, or not.  And, Jesus will be present throughout it all whether I trust him to, or not.  It's always time for me to love what I do, to enjoy the people around me, to see emails and meetings and busyness as a gift, because if I do it that way, then I have nothing to lose.    

I'm sure there's going to be crazy days ahead, as there were for the disciples, and Jesus, too.  But, if I think about the precious short time they got to spend together, and think about my own life that way, I gain a whole new perspective.

The words below are from Psalm 90, in the paraphrase of The Message.  I'll use them as my prayer for the next few weeks, and maybe you will, too:

We live for seventy years or so (with luck we might make it to eighty), And what do we have to show for it? Trouble. Toil and trouble and a marker in the graveyard.  Who can make sense of such rage, such anger against the very ones who fear you?  Oh! Teach us to live well! Teach us to live wisely and well!  Come back, God - how long do we have to wait? - and treat your servants with kindness for a change.  Surprise us with love at daybreak; then we'll skip and dance all the day long.  Make up for the bad times with some good times; we've seen enough evil to last a lifetime.  Let your servants see what you're best at - the ways you rule and bless your children.  And let the loveliness of our Lord, our God, rest on us, confirming the work that we do. Oh, yes. Affirm the work that we do!

dutch delft wedding.

A little bit of a wedding recap for your enjoyment...

I am so happy to share some photos of my sister's wedding from August 11.  It was such a GORGEOUS day in Holland, MI.  We spent the first half of the day picking up the back of Lizzy's dress, like this.

See those balloons going up the railings to the Chapel doors?  I LOVE THEM.  They were huge, and such a fun thing to see bopping around in the wind.

Brook Collier was the photographer- out of Grand Rapids, MI.  She was so relaxed and nice to work with, and even put up with our idea to drive all the way down to the beach after the ceremony!

Love those balloons!!

This is the inside of the newly redone Western Seminary Chapel, and that's my cousin- the Rev. Kate Kooyman, who is the chaplain at Hope College (right next door to Western Seminary).  She officiated the wedding and did such a fabulous job.

Great photo of my mom with two nephews, Joe and Greg DeYoung.  They've gotten taller over the years, and did a beautiful job of ushering at the wedding.

Such a happy couple!

I didn't get any pictures of me with my own husband, nor did I get any of the reception venue.  Hopefully those are still to come from the photographer, Brooke (I'm sure they are!).  

The Scripture I had the privilege to read at my sister's wedding was from Ruth, Chapter 1.  It reads: 

Again they cried openly. Orpah kissed her mother-in-law good-bye; but Ruth embraced her and held on.  Naomi said, "Look, your sister-in-law is going back home to live with her own people and gods; go with her."  But Ruth said, "Don't force me to leave you; don't make me go home. Where you go, I go; and where you live, I'll live. Your people are my people, your God is my god; where you die, I'll die, and that's where I'll be buried, so help me God—not even death itself is going to come between us!" (The Message paraphrase).

My cousin, Kate, did such a good job of talking about covenant, about God's Hesed.  Here is part of what she wrote: "There’s a word for God’s covenant faithfulness in Hebrew. HESED. Hesed is crazy loyalty. It’s love that costs something. It’s faithfulness that makes no sense. HESED is how the God of Israel loves his people. Over and over, in spite of our failings, this God comes back to the covenant he made and renews it, strengthens it, makes good on it. There is no shadow of turning in HESED. Great is God’s HESED."

I've done a lot of weddings myself, recently, and I am totally in agreement with what Kate was talking about.  The covenant we make in marriage, the promises and vows we say to each other, are really a reflection of the covenant God has made with us, as his people.  Marriage is a beautiful, wonderful, awesome, yet tricky thing, at times.  But, God's love and promises are perfect, never-ending, and constantly being made known to us.  We see it in Ruth, and we see it in Jesus- not even death can come between us and the love of God.  

Depending on what you believe, marriage can have a greater significance on the relationship ladder, but in reality, we are constantly working on all of our relationships- whether it's our spouse we see everyday, or our best friend who lives hundreds of miles away.  It's helpful, at least for me, to remember that my relationship with God will never go away, never be threatened, renegotiated, or lost.  Because of Him, we know how to love others.  

Love you, Lizzy and Daniel!

laugh with me.

Well, I decided to try my hand at blogging again!

I've tried a few times before with no luck.  The blog world is so big now that I figured no one would care about what I have to say.

But, really, there's so much negative politics, a lot of bad theology, and many bloggers that perpetuate consumerism masked as "design", that I thought "certainly I can contribute something worthwhile to the wider world."

And so, there you have it, folks, my rationale for blogging a blog that will be lifestyle meets practical theology meets art/design (hopefully).

I also think it'll be good to discipline myself to write.  Especially because writing for pleasure isn't something I do very often, and that is sad!  It's such a gift to be able to create in this way.  And if people read it, that's just icing on the cake.

For now, though, I'll leave you with a bit about my blog name.  "So Sarah Laughed" comes from the book of Genesis, chapters 18 and 21.  I won't go into the whole story- many of you know it- but I simply love these verses and try to remember them as often as I can.

Sarah and Abraham were so surprised by God's gift of a son later in life, and so filled with joy, that they named him Isaac, which in Hebrew means "He will laugh" or "God laughs".  In any case, these verses remind me that there is so much surprise, not only in life, but in our vocations, as well.  Life is filled with the unknown and unexpected; just when we think we're done with one transition, we're faced with the next.  And if we're not careful (I'm preaching to myself here, too) we can forget to find joy where there only seems to be newness, strangeness, lostness, etc.

This blog is, I suppose, an effort on my part to practice gratitude, to laugh, to think, to pray, to theologize, to be prophetic (or, at least, work on it), to articulate grace, to seek beauty, to be joyful, to make an offering, and to try and laugh at myself (not a lack of situations to laugh at myself about).

So, bear with me, friends.  I'm about to embark on this vulnerable blogging journey.